Bemusing Thoughts and Sheer Incoherence

First off, my apologies for lack of posts lately. Work life very suddenly took me temporarily overseas on various occasions last month and I pretty much had to leave a few commitments to friends and associates in the industry (plus a few other things) behind. I will get back to you ASAP. Amber O'Hara, that post will be done :)

My overseas excursions were made much more bearable by the fact that I was doing work with my dear friend Erin (by now I assume I no longer have to keep linking to posts about her) and a few close colleagues whose company, work ethic, and everything else I largely 100% enjoy. But I have certainly been bemused by some of the punting/sex industry-related hang ups exhibited by a few of the interesting characters I work with. And I am pleased as well to say (with Erin's permission) that our friendship has grown stronger despite all the doom and gloom predictions by some who thought they knew best. More on the second issue another time.

On the first topic, let me introduce three of the more interesting characters amongst my colleagues:*

• "Bob" is a relatively young guy in his early 30s. He's outwardly very shy and I introduced him to punting (he even reads this blog). He's extremely open about his punting with me and others within our circles who are receptive to and/or non-judgmental over this behaviour. Whilst he enjoys relatively blunt discussions/tips as to good providers, he's always struck me as someone who is incredible respectful of workers and people at large. This guy has literally gone from someone who has no idea how to approach a woman, who barely had any confidence in the sexual side of things, to becoming someone who is so much more at ease with himself and the world partly as a result of just opening up to the possibilities of the untethered and relatively non-judgmental experiences of the industry.

• Phil is a middle-aged guy who looks quite a lot younger than his real age. Although he is open to admitting his punting to a small circle of people, the at times crazy lengths he went to in order to hide his presence at parlours when we went together (like ducking his head down right behind my torso - he's much taller than me - in order to conceal his presence in the more "public" areas of the parlours) is highly indicative of the extremely conflicted views he has of his habit.

• Mike is probably in his 40s - he knows that a lot of people at our work are punters and whilst he rarely openly criticises the industry or the workers directly, he has the tendency to (according to Erin) express supposed pity and concern for the emotional and physical well-being of workers in terms that suggest he views such participants as either some sort of mentally deformed or wilful idiots who choose to damage themselves.

Some of the hang ups/views of these guys are relatively harmless. For example, when we went to parlours, Bob and I had a very distinct disputes resolution process for who gets to pick the girl if our eyes both fall on one. And he made me promise that if he "won", I would not proceed to book the girl after him since he can't bear the thought of going before his mate and so forth. Call me crazy but since the act of punting requires everybody involved to expose themselves to an extent to the very wide gene pool, this wouldn't have been my biggest worry. But whatever makes a mate comfy! We've always played by this rule.

I can't understand why Phil behaved as he did. He's not outwardly ashamed of his punting and the places we went to tended to do great jobs in reducing mingling between punters to an absolute minimum. Yet the rather hilarious attempts (the one described above is just one of many) at "hiding" himself at places where most really hardly gave a shit for him being there, other than him causing no trouble and dropping $$, seem illogical to me.

Mike's case is the most concerning IMO. This is a guy who's never had any qualms about exhibiting trophy GFs/wives who are obviously only with him for his $$, for they rarely if ever matched on the scale of relative attractiveness and mutual interests. The guy also has very few qualms about throwing alcohol at the less socially savvy and having his way with them.  I'll emphasise that AFAIK those people are not completely out or incapable of consenting by then. It's just that the acts wouldn't be called tasteful or appropriate by most people of decent sensibilities. Some of the dark, misogynistic, and conquest-based undertones of his attitude are frankly very obvious.

Yet all of these guys are absolutely brilliant in these respective fields of work. You're talking about superb formal qualifications, impeccable work histories (like working with heads of state and top tier organisations etc), and wouldn't ever take the lazy route on any analysis for work.

All that I can say is sex/this industry has a way of "getting" to people.